Soul Mate Resolution
By Bart Sharp
Having a relationship that is completely fulfilling is often termed by many as finding one’s soulmate, a special person out there we have had a lifetimes with and/or have a special purpose. However, the idea we may be lucky enough to find or have such a magical occurrence as a soulmate may be unlikely.
Soul Mates / Relationships are gifts that can be magical but they also mirror of what we attract and our conscious mind draws in a partner who represents what we have become or not resolved. The unconscious mind attracts what we have not resolved in relationships, we may think how unappealing it is to be sexually drawn to someone who is similar to our own father or mother but it is often how relationships unconsciously work. It is a friction and likeness mixture that creates the spiciness of sexual attraction. It all comes from the unresolved aspects that our shadow lives as. This is less about physical attraction but the unseen aspects that has moved people together.
Relationships are working teachers in our development. If we wish to have an evolving relationship, an important part is understanding why we are attracted to our partner and look at our own shadow that reflects our attraction. When we look at our shadow we begin to see the anger and other repressed emotions we have held inside in our childhood and we gain insight in how we are attracted to a partner in relation to those issues. Those are the framework of how we create relationships in general.
When we are able to explore issues that our parents taught us we can come to peace with them. Most importantly we no longer have a need to resist that parent or resent the past experiences we had with them. We can have gratitude for issues and see them as a part of us as we drop into a greater space of self-love. This is most likely going to occur when we have identified and have resolution with these issues.
As we emerge into a greater grace with our selves we seek relationships differently. We no longer need one, expend countless energy in a search for someone but let them come to us. We no longer have the unconscious drive to attract a partner who is similar to our parent. The conscious mind does not push us to resolve this with another because we resolved it in ourselves. We simply go out and meet people and see potential partners differently.
Looking for a partner to complete us is unnecessary because we found our emotional autonomy in ourselves. A partner is a great addition whose chemistry into your life opens us to greater states of being or helps us in other spiritual/emotional or practical paths.
In the process of discovering how we have created our limitations with parents we see how it is manifested in such emotions as anger, fear, shame and other feelings. This is the real work to see how the shadows are held inside of us. This is the journey of the masculine to see how we have created our defensiveness, defects and neediness from these beliefs. In this phase we get into the dirty parts of ourselves to see what scars inhibit us the most.
After some time we begin to know our shadow and we no longer hide from it. It is a part of us in the masculine we no longer have to push out in a defensive or aggressive way. When the masculine relaxes into its self the feminine is allowed to come forth more.
The creative side of the feminine comes forth to be expressed. It brings up the question, “What occurred to suppress the feminine so it cannot be expressive?” It could be a feeling, a sadness we could not be ourselves or we felt we were unimportant as a member of her family. What occurs often is repressed anger from something like sadness. Whatever story we address the passion we held inside begins to emerge again. The feminine becomes alive in a new way. When we are able to connect to this source of internal freedom the loving, nurturing, spontaneous side of the feminine comes out to play.
Masculine and feminine begin to merge. We have the abilities to see greater possibilities that the feminine opens in its abilities to see the whole picture and the general strength of the masculine to get the job done. In this state of balance and completion we began to create bigger dreams, the feminine flows and ideas while the masculine has the courage to move forward. The feminine nurtures those around so our dreams grow more spontaneously while the masculine has the clarity to see the parts needed to complete a project.
When we are in balance of the masculine/feminine aspects a state of higher wisdom flows with us, our greater dreams and possibilities come to us because like wisdom it comes from a communion from being in touch with a higher power from within. There is a freedom within because we feel complete in our own self-love, this extends out in relationships with the feeling of needing this. We are no longer driven by an unconscious force but look for a possibility for a partner who fits the person we have become. Someone to complement our spiritual journey instead of someone to fulfill an unconscious need inside of us.
Relationship comes to us to be shared as a higher purpose, it is no longer to fulfill a need. We have learned how to fulfill our needs. In fact, few will likely fit into our life because we will accept only someone who can be some form of equal to the vibrational level we have become, a different kind of soulmate. This a soulmate who reflects who we have evolved to.
This is a relationship that the concept of soulmates, a relationship that resonates on various levels of loving. In order to get to this level we are required to find our own damaged parts and integrate them back into a holistic functioning inside of us. From this place we know our soul well enough to have an equal partner or special form of soulmate. We match similar vibrational levels of awareness and our souls can celebrate the relationship of self-actualization. Those who develop as individuals to become couples of a higher connection have a wonderful gift, this is what so many soulmates seek.