Therapy For The Soul. A Process For Resolving Internal Conflicts

Therapy For The Soul.  A Process For Resolving Internal Conflicts

By Bart Sharp

The process of letting go of the pain of anger and grieving in an internal conflict is both an emotional and mental process.  Addressing these issues separately in body, mind and spirit maybe the most effective way in conflict resolution.

A friend of mine had broken up with her lover and called me to talk.  We spent time discussing the what’s and why’s it happened.  Then the conversation came to the point of what to do right now.  My friend was at a big loss in her life and did not know what course of direction to take in finding resolution within her self.

It was suggested to my broken friend suggested a process of giving the problem up to god and leaving it in god’s hands.  Direction will come.  Other advice is to begin the process of finding how my friend created the relationship and the mistakes that she made in the process.  Both strategies are good advice.

There was more pressing need for my friend.  To confront what is immediately in front of the person in the crises first.  In this case my friend was angry and grieving.  It is the strongest influence upon her.  The message that her body was conveying through the emotions was, “Experience these feelings”.

When we address our emotions internally we began a visceral process of releasing it the distraught.  In this stage of crises figuring out the problem intellectually will not resolve it within our body.  In fact if we find that it does we may be suppressing the raw emotion by believing we have it all figured out.

The release of anger may be as simple as acknowledgment of the anger, or sharing how angry we are.  I sometimes need a good scream.  All of these methods are about getting in touch with the anger inside of you and then expressing to release.   Projecting the angst at the person you are mad at may not be the best way to express to release.  It depends on the situation.

Grieving may take longer than anger.  I allow myself to cry or be sad as much as I feel it.  I find that crying is a more effective release.  I personally try to get to the source of my sadness so the tears more readily come out.

When the emotions are completely released there is something inside of me that feels resolved.  I am ready to move on to another step like figuring out what I did to create this dilemma and or prayer.  By living my feelings they are fully experienced and do not need to be suppressed.  I am less likely to relive them because I have let the raw emotions run their course.  I am also more likely to have better clarity when I process the issues because my emotions will not an inflamed reference influencing my thoughts.

Experiencing emotions are more body-based experiences while planning and analysis are mental.  That is why it is good to do each separate and in the order that they are needed most.  If we do both aspects fully we then can open our heart to a higher power more completely like my friend thought to do as the first step.