Body Consciousness: A Higher Resolution To Arguments
By Bart Sharp
What perpetuates arguments and creates crises in a relationship? We may wonder, “How did something get so out of hand from an issue so small and so quickly? Two components that keep a disagreement alive and growing are living in a judgment we are right and maintaining a defensive point of view to the other person. Whatever we judge as right or wrong we generally cannot see beyond the judgment. In an argument, judging who is more right guides us to the slippery slope of a contest of who can dominate over the other person.
Looking back at these types of arguments we have to wonder of what insanity do we have because we are in these fights with the people we love and care for. It may not be winning over the other people that motivates us but defending ourselves from the illusion we will be hurt in some (unconscious) way. This is the lie that perpetuates arguments.
How do we unlock our judgments and fears someone can hurt us through their disagreements? It is simple strategy, we move our attention from our mind and open our heart when we relate to the other person. When we begin making a choice to open our heart to the other person our defensive position moves aside as well. We begin to perceive the other person instead of judging them. When we perceive in an open-hearted attitude we perceive how it is to be in the other person’s shoes and see their distress. It is easier to be in compassion for the other person and the will to defend ourselves begins to disappear.
With our heart open we listen with wisdom. We are connected into the other person’s reality at a deeper level to see their world in a greater way. We are also connected to something greater within us in the world of the heart; a consciousness much bigger than the knowledge and personal experiences the brain can reference from. We respond to the other person in a non-judging, more profound way that opens the relationship to connection.
To open our heart is a choice and it is as easy as placing our attention there in the center of our chest while we are with other people. We ask ourselves to do so and at some level and it happens. If we pay attention to our heart we will perceive the intensity in our brain lessens and something gets lighter in our chest. The more we maintain our attention on the heart our conversation will open to a greater potential of allowance for that person. We enable the power of listening from a higher love to be in action, on a path to emotional transformation and greater body consciousness.